If the presidential campaign stays as inane has it’s been in the last few days, we can count on having our brains gradually anaesthetized by November. Now is the time to MEMORIZE A LIST OF THE PROBLEMS that will hit us like many tons of bricks as soon as the contest is over. We need to find an easy way to remember the nation’s problems, because unless McCain and Obama both decide to talk about the issues, the nation as a whole will be considerably dumber when they’re through. I’ve decided that this poem will help. I’ll irritate a few people with this, but when you’re mad, you’re still feeling human emotions and there may be hope for you yet. So — enjoy! Here goes:
Immigration, education, unemployment rocks the nation
Iran, Iraq, Afghanistan, Osama’s still a wanted man
Hurricanes give little hope with infrastructure on the ropes
Oh — is your budget in the tank? That house was yours — now it’s the bank’s.
Ned "Don’t Quote Me" Hodgman